Breath
by NightWorldPack
Summary: Post New Moon, Bella's going through a rough break up with Edward as Leah is with Sam.. Bella is finding new ways to cope with the lost of Edward. But those ways aren't exactly safe. Bella and Leah Somehow Find comfort in one another. They find themselves enjoying each others company, perhaps to much? BxL FemSlash Future Lemons. -NWP
1. Pain

**A/N ; This happens to be my first story, i welcome good and bad reviews, tell me if you like what I'm writing if not how can i fix it.. **

**Keep an open mind.  
**

**-NWP**

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_***Chapter One - Pain***_

_Bella POV_

He's gone. Gone. The word repeating in my head.

Gone. Left alone with no heart, no soul. Gone. "It'll be like I never existed." but you did, you waltzed in, captured my heart only to destroy it. Gone.

Nothings right anymore, too many memories, too much pain.

I stumble back home only to come face to face with a very angry Charlie

"Isabella, where have you been? I've been worried sick."

I brush past him too numb to feel too numb to care. I hear him call my name but the sound of my dying heart over powers it.

Ascending ever so slowly, ever so fragile up the stairs to my room, stop mid step with one word in my mind.

**Pain**.

I turn and walk towards the bathroom.

**Pain**.

Closing and locking the door, i turn the faucet on to hot water.

**Pain**.

I open cabinets, searching for relief. I come across a box of double-edged razors.

**Pain**.

Any pain can be better than this hole in my chest where my heart should be. I step in the tub, fully clothed, close my eyes and drag a razor across my wrist.

**Pain**.

This new sensation, this new feeling unleashing a new side of me.

**Pain**.

Craving it. Addicted to it. Welcoming it.

**Pain**.

Bittersweet** Pain**

Laying back, sinking into the tub, the hot water giving me a pleasant sting. I close my eyes for what feels like five minutes only to be awakened by Charlie banging on the door,

"Bella? Bella are you ok? You've been in there for hours."

Hours? Have I really been in here that long? I look at the water it had a pink-ish tint to its usual clear color,

I drain the tub and unlock the door and opened it.

"God, Bella what happened?"

I look at my father, who looked into my eyes and gasped

"Bella?"

I walked around him to my room. I open my palm and saw it and im reminded of it.

**Pain**.

I pull up my sleeves and notice cuts, not just one but ten cuts each marking my wrist from left to right ten perfect lines. I change my clothes, crawl under my blanket and let sleep consume me.

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	2. High Timez

**A/N; Enjoy Chapter Two.**

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***Chapter Two - High Timez***

_Leah POV_

That son of a bitch! How dare he? With my cousin? My own flesh and blood! If I ever see either of those two again I'll catch a fucking case.

Sam, the love of my life, my entire world sneaking behind my back and screwing my cousin!? Worthless asshole!

"Hey Lee? You OK?"

My little brother, Seth asked through my closed-door

"Yea, I'm fine" as I try to calm down

"Oh, ok well I'm here if you need me..."

My sweet little brother always so sweet and caring. I walk to my door and opened it, I ruffled his hair

"Thanks squirt" I chuckled

I walked down the stairs to see my mom cooking.

"Hi mom, bye mom" I say running out the door and into the forest, my personal sanctuary,

I dig in my pocket for my iPod and click shuffle, the first song that plays is Breath by Breaking Benjamin and get lost in thought not paying attention to where I'm walking and end up by the cliff staring off at the water as I start to sing,

_"So sacrifice yourself, and let me have what's left._

_I know that I can find the fire in your eyes._

_I'm going all the way, get away, please._

_You take the breath right out of me._

_You left a hole where my heart should be._

_You got to fight just to make it through,_

_'cause I will be the death of you..."_

I didn't realize I was crying until I tasted the saltines of my tears on my lips. 4 years gone... Heartbroken and alone...

I brush myself off and start the short walk home. Once I get home and walk through the door I smell him, that scent that hit me like a ton of bricks, the scent that brought me so much happiness only to crash it down.

_Sam._

I walk into the kitchen and there _he_ was, with _her_

"What the fuck do you two want?" I asked bitterly

"Leah" my mom said sternly

"Hey Le-Le" _HE_ said.

"Don't call me that, asshole!" I yell at him "_YOU _lost the right to call me that"

I shouted before storming up the stairs to my room and slamming the door. My phone vibrates on my night stand signaling I have a text, I open it up and it's from my best friend, Rachel Black.

_Hey bitch, I got a twenty today, you game?_

I chuckled and texted back.

_Yeah, where and when?_ I ask eagerly

I laugh when I got an immediate response.

_Right now, look out your window._

I step to my window and push aside the curtains to see Rachel and her twin sister Rebecca. I open up my night stand for my lighter and rolling paper and run down the stairs

"Leah, where are you going?" my mother asks

"Out and about, be home later, bye" I said, rushing to close the door behind me.

"Hey girls, let's do this" I said with a knowing smirk about what's gonna go down.

We walk through the forest until we hit a clearing with a blanket and a bunch of junk food and drinks

"You planned this didn't you?" I said mock accusingly.

"Yep" they both said, popping the "p"

We all sat down and Rachel hands me the baggy, I dug into my pocket for my rolling paper, I broke up the weed and rolled the joint.

"Lighter please." I said holding my hand out.

"Why do you get the first hit?" Rebecca whines

"Cause I rolled it" I said giggling.

"Fine" she huffs and hands me the lighter.

I slip the joint between my lips, light it and inhale deeply, holding it in and tries to pass it to Rachel, who shakes her head and says

"Puff, Puff, Pass"

I exhale and take another hit, bigger than the first and passed it to Rachel who greedily takes two large hits at once, holds it in for a few seconds and then exhales, blowing smoke into our faces.

"that's how it's done" she says proudly

Rebecca does the same and passes it to me and we repeat the cycle until we're all stoned and laughing at nothing. I look at my phone to see we've been out here for about 3 hours.

"Shit guys we gotta go" I said, panicking.

Both girls looked at me and started laughing.

"Chill, Leah it's ok, just relax"

Right as she says it my phone goes off I look at the caller ID and notice it's my mom calling, I quickly answer it.

"Hello?"

"Leah Clearwater, where are you?" my mom damn near yelled through the phone

"Relax mom I'm with Rach and Becca" I say slowly

I hear talking in the back and my mother huffing before I hear _HIS_ voice

"Le-Le-"

"**_DON'T CALL ME THAT!_**" I spat through the phone, cutting him off.

"Ok, ok, Leah, where are you?" he asks carefully

"Why would you care _Samuel_?" i asked, sneering at his name.

"I still care about you Leah" he says sadly

"Guess what Sammy." I say sweetly

"What?" he asked nervously

"**I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!**" I yelled before slamming my phone shut.

I look at my friends who are holding in their laughter, looking at their faces causes me to start laughing causing Rachel and Rebecca to start laughing.

Once we all calm down still in our pot induced haze we pack up making the trip home. When we reached my back yard I saw my parents standing outside, I turn to look at my friends

"Well it's been fun, but see you guys later" i say to my best friends

They look at me with relief in their eyes and quickly stumble away I look towards my parents, shrug my shoulders and walk pass them

"Leah Anne Clearwater, where were you and what were you doing?!"

I hear my mother shout. I completely ignore her and I walk up the stairs to my room, I laid in my bed and tried to enjoy my high, well whats left of it anyways.

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	3. Take Care

**A/N ; After Reading Each Chapter Please Review!**

**-NWP**

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***Chapter Three - Take Care***

_Bella POV_

Waking up the next day I'm still so tired I look at my clock and notice it's 6 in the afternoon, I try to move but my body's numb and I can't feel anything I hear my dad talking to someone down stairs, then I heard 2 pairs of heavy foot steps, I'm surprised when someone knocks on my door

"Bella? Can I come in?"

I don't know that voice it sounds too...deep compared to Edwards velvet like voice.

**Edward. **

**Gone. **

**Pain.**

My body suddenly found a motive to move. I get up and open the door to see 2 copper toned men standing there, one I immediately recognize as Jacob. I look at their faces when they both look into my eyes, they gasp

"Bella?" they questioned.

'I know what my name is asshole' A voice says in the back of my head

"what do you guys want?" I ask with no emotion found in my voice

"We were w-wondering if you wanted to hang with us" the man I now remembered as Embry said.

I look at them, and just as I'm about to decline Charlie came up the stairs.

"That's a great idea, have fun Bella"

I glare at him as if my eyes can make him burst into flames. Turning around I closed my door and changed my clothes. I pack my razor in tissue paper and stuff it in my pocket.

Walking down the stairs I realized they were waiting by the door. Without looking I walked out the front door to Jacobs Rabbit and climbed in the back seat realizing my iPod was in my pocket I reached in and pressed play.

_I see nothing in your eyes, and the more I see the less I like._

_Is it over yet, in my head?_

_I know nothing of your kind, and I won't reveal your evil mind._

_Is it over yet? I can't win._

_So sacrifice yourself, and let me have what's left._  
_I know that I can find the fire in your eyes._  
_I'm going all the way, get away, please._

_You take the breath right out of me._  
_You left a hole where my heart should be._  
_You got to fight just to make it through,_  
_'cause I will be the death of you._

_This will be all over soon._  
_Pour salt into the open wound._

I didn't realize I was singing until l looked up and saw Jacob and his friend were staring at me in awe

"What?" I ask self-consciously

They both looked at me but Embry spoke first,

"Wow, uhm you sound amazing, uh what song is that?"

Shocked by his answer I stuttered out

"B-Breath by Breaking Benjamin"

They both make weird faces toward each other, shrug and got out the car and walked towards a white house, just then i realized we have reached whatever hell hole I was being tortured into being at.  
I follow in suit and walk through the house door to see Jacob and Embry play fighting with the youngest Clearwater, Seth.

"Hey Bella, what's up?"

I barely heard him over my music but I looked at him and all happiness drained from his face. He was about to say something before his sister, Leah walked down the stairs and looked between me and Seth, withering under her stare I walked back out the door and started walking down the street singing my song

_You take the breath right out of me._  
_You left a hole where my heart should be._  
_You got to fight just to make it through,_  
_'cause I will be the death of you._

_I'm waiting, I'm praying, realize, start hating._

_You take the breath right out of me._  
_You left a hole where my heart should be._  
_You got to fight just to make it through,_  
_'cause I will be the death of you._

I didn't realize Leah was next to me, I took out my headphones and realized Leah was singing with tears in her eyes.

"Do you wanna walk with me?" Leah asks quietly

I nodded and started walking a route I remembered as a kid. We ended up on the cliffs. She pulls out a lighter and what looks like a cigarette. I stared at her.

"You smoke?" she asks me

I shake my head no but still stare.

"How do you get through?" shes asked

My breath hitched, how did she know? Is it noticeable?

"The look in your eyes, it's the same look I see in the mirror everyday, cold, broken, alone...I understand" she whispers.

Felling like I can open up to her I roll up my sleeves and show her my cuts. She looks at them, then my face and holds out her hand

"Give it to me" she demands

I panic, she knows, she's gonna take it from me before I realized what I'm doing I shake my head no and try to stand up to walk away.

She grabs my arm and pulls me back down. I look into her eyes and see the one rich brown of her eyes are now almost black.

"_**Give. It. To. Me**_" she says deathly slow.

I try to yank my hand free but she has an iron grip. I reach into my pocket reluctantly handing her my wrapped up razor. She let's go of my arm, walks towards the cliff and throws it into the water. She walks back towards me

"That doesn't help, it makes it worse, and because of it, you are now my new best friend" she says in a matter of fact tone

Then she does something I'd never expect, she hugged me and whispered in my ear

"We're gonna take care of each other"

The way she says it makes me have no choice but to believe her. Today is the first day of our new life.


	4. Raised By Wolves

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**-NWP  
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***Chapter Four - Raised By Wolves***

_Leah POV_

Waking up at 6 o'clock am can be a pain in the ass since I graduated 2 years ago, but I'm driving to get my favorite emo breakfast. Reaching her house I walk right in

"Hi Charlie!" I yell enthusiastically

He doesn't even jump, I've been showing up at the crack ass of dawn for about a few week so he's use to.

"Mornin' Leah" he grumbles in response.

I walk up the stairs, two at a time to reach Bella's door. Walking in I notice she's still sleeping. I jump on the bed.

"WAKEY WAKEY SUNSHINE!" I yell at the top of my lungs.

Bella pushes me off, obviously pissed off to be woken up at 6:30 on a Saturday.

Grumbling she turns over to look at her clock once she notices the time she glares at me

"_What. The. Fuck._" she growls.

Giggling, I get up and try to move the covers but she stops me.

"NO!" Bella yells

Smirking I ask "Bella...are you naked under there?"

Her face reddens but she shakes her head no. Yanking the blankets up I notice blood stains on her sheets.

"Bella, what is that?"

She looks away, finding everything else interesting. I walk towards her and grab her arms, pulling her sleeves up I notice new cuts.

"When?" is the only thing I can say

She looks at me with tears in her eyes. Pleading for me not to react badly.

"Last night, I found old notes and pictures under my floor boards" she whispers

I get up and take a few steps away I look at her.

"Bella...you can talk to me, I'm here, I understand, please just stop" I beg.

She looks at me crying "Leah, I'm sorry, I..."

She trails off, I walk towards her and hug her. It's only been a few weeks, I shouldn't expect for her to go from sad to Malibu Barbie over night.

"It's ok, I'm here" I say soothingly.

Holding her for what feels like hours I notice she's asleep I lay her down, climb into bed next to her and she snuggled into me. I try to move but her grip tightens

"Mmmmm sleep" she mumbles

Chuckling I lay back down and let her cuddle closer into me.

_"Leah..."_ she whispers

I look and notice she's asleep.

_"Don't go..." _she begs in her dream

I pull her closer trying to reassure her I'm not going anywhere

_"Leah...run!"_ she yells thrashing around the bed.

I sit up trying to wake her up.

"Bella, Bella wake up!" I shake her

She shot up, eyes wide. I watch her making sure she's ok. She glances at me, confused.

"Leah?" she asked still looking confused

I nod my head not knowing what to say. She launches herself at me, crying

"Oh god Leah...Black wolf...you dead" she says between sobs.

I rock her back and forth trying to soothe her from the bad dream.

"I'm right here Bella, I'm ok" I say quietly.

She looks at me with tear filled eyes.

"You've been my rock, my best friend I can't lose you too"

I see the desperation in her eyes.

"I promise Bella, I'm not going anywhere you're stuck with me"

She hugs me tighter. Right at this moment our stomachs make their presence known.

Giggling I get up, pulling her along with me and walk down the stairs. She notices the box of doughnuts and makes a beeline for it, ripping it open she pulls out her favorite,

a Boston Creme Pie while I pull up a Chocolate covered with rainbow sprinkles. I finish 2 just as she finished her first, but I'm still hungry...


	5. I Kissed A Girl And I Liked It

_***Chapter Five - I Kissed A Girl And I Liked It***  
_

_Bella POV_

I've noticed Leah's been eating a lot lately. Maybe she eats her feelings? What is she hiding from me? I stare at her and realized she's already on her fourth doughnut.

"Leah are you ok?" I asked, concerned.

"Yeah, I'm just really hungry" she responded while she continued to stuff her face.

I walk to her and placed the back of my hand on her forehead.

"Leah, are you sure you're ok? You feel abnormally hot, maybe I should take you home?" i asked getting more and more concerned.

"I said I'm fine, jesus Bella just drop it " she snaps.

I stepped back, shocked by her tone. She's never gotten this mad at me before. I turn to walk towards the stairs when her hand shot out and grabbed my arm,

"Bella, I'm sorry I didn't mean to snap at you, I'm sorry"

I shrugged out of her grip. Feeling myself slipping back.

"Go home Leah" I say to her.

With that I walk up the stairs to my room, closed and locked the door.

I hear the front door open and close. I felt the tears slide down my face.

Why didn't she fight with me on it? Did she stop caring?

'She never cared' the voice in the back of my head says

Did she? All these weeks has she been pretending? She only declared friendship because she understood, what if I'm too damaged? Scarred and broken? Getting up I realized that I care more than I thought I did.

I needed to see her, getting up I run down the stairs, I grabbed my keys from the table in the hall and run out the door shutting and locking it on my way out.

I climbed into my truck and start the drive to the Clearwater house to declare my thoughts and feelings towards Leah.

When I got to the house I ran to the front door, knocked and waited impatiently for someone to answer. Sue opened the door,

"Oh, hello Bella, what are you doing here?" she asked puzzled.

Shaking slightly I rushed out

"Is Leah home? I really need to talk to her."

Sue stepped back and pointed towards the stairs. Taking her hint I run up them, tripping twice to see a sick Leah in bed. I rushed to her side.

"Leah? Are you ok?"

She shakes her head no and tries to talk.

"Bella..."

I cut her off before she can finish.

"No, just listen, I care...I care more than I expected, I like having you near me you make me feel safe I know this is all so cliché but I like you, I like you a lot."

Before I try to get up and walk away Leah grabs my arm and pulls me down to where our lips meet. My hearts pounding in my chest, i get a slight pink tint to my cheeks realizing she could probably hear it, it was so loud.

Breaking the kiss Leah looks at me and whispers

"I like you too"

Shocked by her words I kiss her softly and replying with a quick

"Get better soon"

I walk down the stairs slowly to make sure I don't fall down them then say my goodbyes to Seth and Sue who were in the living room,

I walk out the door to my truck and climb in, starting the drive home having her word echo in my mind..

_"I like you too"_

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**A/N ; REVIEW! -NWP_  
_**


	6. Animal I Have Become N Waking The Demon

_****Chapter 6 - Animal I Have Become / Waking The Demon****_

_Leah POV_

I woke up the next morning sore and stiff, stretching out my muscles I remembered.

The Kiss.

I kissed Bella. I kissed a girl. She said she likes me. I can't stop the smile that forms on my face.

I went to do my morning routine before heading down the stairs for breakfast. My steps falter when I see HIM at the table. But the ache I once felt isn't here.

I smile broadly at the thought.

"Hey Lee" Seth says with a mouth full of cereal.

"Good morning everyone" I said with the smile still plastered on my face.

Everyone stops eating and watches. No one speaks until my dad does.

"Leah? Are you alright?" he eyes me carefully.

"Actual daddy, I've never been better"

He looks at me shocked I haven't called him daddy in years.

But it quickly goes away with a happy twinkle in his eyes. I sit next to Seth and ruffle his hair.

He looks at me with his goofy grin and continues to stuff his face. I completely forgot Sam was in the room until he spoke.

"Hi Lee-Lee" he says quietly.

"Good morning Sam" I say with a small smile.

My mom looks at me surprised.

"Who are you and what have you done to my daughter?"

I giggle at her question. I'm about to answer when my phone rings. Once I see who's calling I answer, not caring about the audience.

"Hey baby girl" I say happily

"Hi Leah"

I can hear her blushing at my baby girl comment.

"What can I do for you today?"

I hear her take a deep breath before answering.

"I really wanna see you, can I come over?"

I jump at the thought of seeing her I don't even ask my parents before saying.

"Of course you can, my moms making breakfast come over"

After saying our quick goodbyes I realized everyone was staring at me.

Shrugging my shoulders I go to stand up to get dressed I'm stopped by my mom

"Who's coming over dear?" she asks

I can't stop the smile when I say

"Bella Swan"

Sam chokes on his food, my dad looks at me like I'm an alien, Seth just smiles and my mom says

"I'm glad you're making real friends"

Before I can stop myself I feel my cheeks getting red and saying

"She's more than a friend"

Nothing prepared me for the reactions. Sam slammed his fist down on the table roaring out a

**"NO!" **Sam roared

Seth got up and hugged me in acceptance.

"I'm gonna need to have a chat with this Bella Swan, after _last time_" Seth said and glared at Sam before continuing

"I need to make sure her intentions are pure"

I can't help but think I'm the one with the impure thoughts, before my mind wanders off I hear Sam

**"I forbid it..."**

Looking at my ex, I start shaking. How dare he? He left me for my cousin, he has no right to tell me how to live my life. I walk towards him and shoved his chest.

"Now listen very closely _Samuel_, you can't** FORBID** me from doing anything, this is my life **MINE**, I'm picking up the pieces that **YOU** left behind, **YOU** left **ME** and just when I started hating you less you act like you own me, well guess what **YOU DON'T**" I was in his face growls vibrating in my chest.

I heard a knock on the front door. I rushed to open it and realized Bella was here, holding out a disk. I looked at it confused but before I can ask she says.

"It's a mix tape"

Giggling at her old school technique I grabbed her hand and walked towards the kitchen she stops mid step when she sees Sam. She steps in front of me blocking off his view.

"Leah, you could have said you had company"

I laughed at her statement.

"He's not **MY** company"

I tugged her to sit down next to me but her and Sam where having a staring contest. Bella, having hung out with me too much asked Sam

"So Sam, how's Emily?"

I saw his body tense before he looked at me.

"You told her?" he demands

Bella with her new snappy attitude replies for me.

"**HER** has a name and yes she told me, she told me all about the engagement, you disappearing, coming back and leaving her for Emily, I know."

I place my arm over her shoulders and her head snaps back to me.

"Leah? Your arms are burning up"

My mom, over hearing her rushes to me side. My father gives her a knowing look and Sam gets a shocked but smug look on his face.

"What are you looking at?" I snapped

He shook his head and stood up

"Sue, thank you for breakfast but I have to go"

He walked out the back door and disappeared into the forest.

Just his presence makes me so mad, I got up and went up stares, pulling Bella along with me. Shes concern because I'm burning up. I feel fine but can't exactly control my anger at the moment.

My dad came upstairs and asks to speak with me in the backyard, in private.

I told my dad anything he has to say to me he can say it in front of Bella.

He kept pushing for me to just talk to him in private but I insisted that Bella comes to the backyard with us.

Now we were walking to the backyard, Bella's hand in mine and her blushing right beside me.

My dad turned to look at me.

"Look Leah, I know this is a touchy subject but it needs to be said"

He trailed off as if looking for the right words to say.

"What dad?" I say getting impatient

"Sam couldn't help but.. fall for Emily, it's not hi-"

I didn't let him finish.

"**What**!? it wasn't his fault!? then whose fault was it? Out of all the people in this world he had to leave me for my fucking cousin! Please tell me how it's not **HIS** fault"

"Leah **CALM DOWN**, you're shaking" Bella said from beside me.

"Bella please step away from Leah" my dad said looking Bella in the eyes, she looked at me silently asking for permission, I nodded.  
at that moment I couldn't stop shaking, I could feel my temperature rising and my blood boiling.

"Leah calm down, now is not the place" my dad said backing away cautiously.

That's what made me lose it...

_Bella's POV_

"Bella please step away from Leah" Her dad said looking me in the eyes, I looked at Leah silently asking her permission, she nodded, so I backed away but only a little.

Leah looked like she couldn't stop shaking. I was really worried, is that normal?

"Leah calm down, now is not the place" her dad said backing away from Leah cautiously.

Nothing could have prepared me for what happened next.

A large grey/silverish wolf stood in front of me...


	7. I Don't Care

****Chapter 7 - I Don't Care****

_Bella POV_

I stood there motionless staring at the large grey wolf.

"Leah?" I asked stepping towards her.

The wolf looked towards me and raked its eyes over me, but when its eyes met mine everything froze.

_Me and Leah walking along the beach laughing, holding hands, splashing each other with water, standing at an altar, both in dresses, sitting on a porch watching our kids playing in the yard…_

I was brought out of my thoughts when I heard a

"No way."

"Impossible."

"Sam?"

I look up at my wolf who was whimpering quietly in front of me, I stepped towards her.

"Leah? Sweetheart, I need you to calm down okay? Please?"

I reached for her and ran my fingers through her fur I scratched behind her ear and she made a purring sound.

"Oh, is the big bad wolf purring like a cat?" I teased the large wolf.

I felt the wolf shimmer and then there stood a very naked Leah. I took off my jacket and handed it to her, our hands brush against each other and I felt an electric shock which made Leah and I both gasp.

Being so close to Leah felt right, I stood on my toes and wrapped my arms around her neck and hugged her tightly, I felt her wrap her arms around me,

holding me close.

"Leah, step away from Bella"

I felt Leah tense as she started shaking.

"No" she said to Sam without even looking at him, hold me tighter.

I looked up and saw Sam square his shoulders, standing to his full height

"**Leah, back off. _NOW!_**" Sam ordered

Leah pulled herself away from me and took several steps back. I stood frozen as I watched Leah walk towards Sam with her head down.

"It's time for you to leave Bella" Sam said to me.

He nodded his head to the forest and everyone disappeared leaving me standing there alone. My breath hitched as that familiar word found its way back into my head and into my heart.

**Alone.**

**Pain.**

I looked up and saw Sam still standing there

"You are to tell no one of what you've seen today, leave now and don't come back."

With that he turned and ran into the same woods my Leah disappeared in moments ago.

I don't know how I ended up in my truck, or how I ended up home, but I found myself in the same place as before except its different, this hurt so much more. Nothing could have readied me for this emptiness, this heart wrenching pain I felt in my chest. I dug into my pocket and pulled out my razor, laid it on my bed and stared at it.

Did I need to do this?

Did I need to feel more pain than what i'm feeling already?

I felt myself get scared, its been so long, I forgot what it felt like.

I decided I didn't need to, not yet. I put the razor on my nightstand and clicked off the light and fell into a fitful sleep.

I woke up the next morning determined to not let this ache in my chest get the best of me, I wasn't gonna let myself be dragged back down to that dark place.

I did my morning routine and jumped in my truck and drove to the local store and bought black hair dye. I had to go back to school soon, but I wasn't gonna be the girl they all remember, i'm different.

Hours later I was sporting my new black hair with pink tips, skinnys with rips in them, an off the shoulder shirt and combat boots, when a thought suddenly hit me, didn't the Cullen's have money for me to go to college? After that thought crossed my mind I heard a ringtone, I followed the sound to my closet and found an iPhone and there was a text and an envelope.

_Bella,_

_I opened up your own back account, in case you needed anything, i'm sorry for the way I left, I hope one day you can forgive me._

_Love always,_

_Alice_

I stood frozen in place. I opened the envelope and found a black credit card, a cell phone changer and letters from everyone, everyone except Edward.

I couldn't believe this was happening, was this their goodbye?

Was this them trying to clear their guilty conscience?

I walked out of my room and downstairs, I stared at my truck and realized that wasn't me anymore, i'm not that same girl. I stared at my new credit card and back at my truck and decided I needed a new car. I jumped into my rust bucket and drove to the local dealer, before I could get one foot out the door the car salesman was already next to me. He is short and has brown curly hair.

"Um hello?" I said awkwardly.

The man straighten to his full height, and stuck out his hand

"Hello I'm Thomas"

I stepped out of my truck, closed the door and shook his hand

"Bella" I replied back.

"What can I do for you today?" he asked eagerly

I stood there for a moment, I drove here without the slightest idea of what i want. All i do know is, i want to make a statement.

"I want to replace this piece of junk" i said as i kicked the tire of my truck

Thomas looked at my truck and chuckled

"That is the crappiest truck I've ever seen"

I couldn't help but laugh with him, it was true, the truck was junk and I was more than glad to get rid of it.

"If you would follow me, I think I can find something more…your taste" he said giving me a once over.

I followed the man to a black Mazda 6 with dark tinted windows.

I looked at the car, but it wasn't clicking for me, I shook my head and Thomas walked to a different car it was a dark blue Ford Mustang, this one was a lot nicer than the last but something still wasn't clicking.

I looked around and it caught my eye, in the way back there it was, a pink on black Suzuki GSX-600.

Thomas followed my eyes and smiled.

"If you would follow me"

He started walking toward the bike and I couldn't help but marvel on how amazing it looked. He stopped in front of the bike.

"Did this catch your fancy?" he said with a smile

I nodded my head and Thomas clapped.

"Excellent now lets talk about how much you're willing to pay"

I thought about it for a moment, I had a black credit card, with god knows how much on it. So I answered how i normally would.

"The lowest price possible"

An hour later with my bike loaded up into the bed of my truck I drove to the Black's. I knocked on the door and Billy answered.

"Bella? Um Jacob isn't in"

I laughed at him.

"Who said I was looking for Jacob? I just came to return the truck"

Billy seemed surprised but asked

"What's wrong with it?"

I shook my head.

"Nothing, I'm just returning it I don't need nor want it anymore" i answered

I handed him the keys and the registration/lease, and walked to the truck, pulled the tailgate down and wheeled my bike carefully off.

"Bella? How did you get that?" I heard Billy asked surprised

I smiled at him

"A gift from the Cullens" i said and gave him a mischivious

I climbed on my bike, started it and rode off. When I got home I downloaded music on my new phone, put on the headphones and started blasting music

Your magic white rabbit

Has left it's writing on the wall

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

You can't fix your broken promise

Our ties have come undone

I will not be used to be battered and abused

It's the reason why I choose to cut my losses

Your lies fool no one

Your magic white rabbit

Your white room straight jacket

Your magic white rabbit

Has left it's writing on the wall

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

We're falling and we're losing control

Your pulling us and dragging us down this dead end road

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

You can't offer your poison to me

In your kingdom of filth

White Rabbit

Straight jacket

Your magic white rabbit

Has left it's writing on the wall

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

We're falling and we're losing control

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

I won't be pushed aside

I will be heard

I will get what I want

What I deserve

I won't be pushed aside

I will be heard

I will get what I want

What I deserve

We're falling and we're losing control

Your pulling us and dragging us down this dead end road

Your magic white rabbit

Has left it's writing on the wall

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

We're falling and we're losing control

Your pulling us and dragging us down this dead end road

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

Your magic white rabbit

Has left it's writing on the wall

We follow like Alice

And just keep diving down the hole

Diving down the hole!

When the song ended I felt free, care free to be exact, I had my whole life ahead of me and I wasn't going to waste it missing people. I was gonna move on and be my own person. With that thought I dozed off into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

**A/N - So I've been thinking, I started this from the new moon timeline, I was wondering how you would feel if I wrote a whole series? Like start from the twilight timeline and so on...**

**Review and tell me what you think!**

**-NWP**


	8. Open Wounds

****Chapter 8 - Open Wounds****

* * *

_Leah POV_

I haven't seen Bella in a few days and I felt like a part of me was missing. I was currently running patrol with Uley since no one else could stand me.

_They love you Lee-Lee_.

I heard the alpha say in my head.

_Whatever you say Uley_.

I snidely replied.

He stopped running and looked at me.

_Well, I love you_…

I stopped and froze where I stood.

_Uley…_ I started.

_Sam_. The alpha cut me off

_Fine.. Uley listen._.

I heard his sigh.

_You say you love me but you're missing something important here…_ I trailed off

_And what would that be?_ He asked somewhere between amused and annoyed

Oh this is gonna be good.

_Sammy?_ I said innocently

_Yes Lee-Lee_?

_Emily_…

After I said her name my mind was filled with memories of him and Emily.

The day he imprinted. Every touch, kiss, and look. When he lost control and clawed her face.

Everything spun in my head until it all went black

_Why did you say her name?_ he growled defensively.

_Because Uley, you don't love me and honestly I don't love you_.

He whined.

_Since when_?

I couldn't help it. I thought of the day I phased near Bella

Bella and I walking along the beach laughing, holding hands, splashing each other with water, standing at an alter, both in white dresses, sitting on a porch watching our 2 boys playing in the yard…

My wolf whimpered pitifully.

_Its ok Lee-Lee I'll help you fight it_

_**Hold the hell up Uley**, you cant fight yours but you expect me to fight mine, and this seems fair to you because…._?

_Because we belong together_

I sat there for a moment, silent.

_Lee-Lee?_

I couldn't help it, I laughed.

_What's so funny?_

_You, Uley honestly, I don't want you. Go home to Emily I'll finish up patrol_.

I felt the shimmer that meant he phased out. I continued to run patrol until I felt another shimmer

_Lee?_

_Yes, Sethy?_

_You can head home now I got it from here_.

_Will do, thanks kid._

I phased in the woods behind my house and walking up the steps I saw a pink and black bike zoom past, shrugging my shoulders I walked into my house and saw the elders

"What's going on?" I asked

Billy looked at me with a grim look on his face

"Its Bella"

My instincts immediately went into overdrive.

"What happened? Is she ok? Where is she? What the fuck is going on?!" I asked all in one breath

Billy held up his hand and I stopped talking

"it seems she's speaking to the Cullens again"

No.

This cant be happening. The same people who hurt her?

"I have to see her" I demanded.

"Leah that isn't a good idea, Bella isn't exactly... Bella anymore"

"What the hell is that suppose to mean?" I snapped

"She seems to have made extreme changes to herself"

I started pacing, then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

The bike.

"That was her wasn't it? The one on the bike?"

Billy nodded his head.

"How the hell did she get a bike?"

"She said it was a gift from the Cullens"

I stared at him incredulously.

My wolf whimpered at the thought of both Bella being on a bike and talking to the Cullens.

I ran up to my room ignoring everyone, slammed and locked my door. I dug through my nightstand until I found the mix tape Bella made me, I put it in my CD player and pressed play and waited for the first song to play.

_You're not alone_  
_Together we stand_  
_I'll be by your side_  
_You know I'll take your hand_  
_When it gets cold_  
_And it feels like the end_  
_There's no place to go_  
_You know I won't give in_  
_No, I won't give in_

_Keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it through_  
_Just stay strong_  
_Cause you know I'm here for you_  
_I'm here for you_  
_There's nothing you can say_  
_Nothing you can do_  
_There's no other way when it comes to the truth_  
_So, keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it through_

_So far away_  
_I wish you were here_  
_Before it's too late_  
_This could all disappear_  
_Before the door's closed_  
_And it comes to an end_  
_With you by my side_  
_I'll fight and defend, yeah, yeah_

_Keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it through_  
_Just stay strong_  
_Cause you know I'm here for you_  
_I'm here for you_  
_There's nothing you can say_  
_Nothing you can do_  
_There's no other way when it comes to the truth_  
_So, keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it through_

_Hear me when I say_  
_When I say I believe._  
_Nothing's gonna change_  
_Nothing's gonna change destiny_  
_Whatever's meant to be_  
_Will work out perfectly_  
_Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah_  
_La da da da, la da da da_  
_La da da da da da da da da_

_Keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it through_  
_Just stay strong_  
_Cause you know I'm here for you_  
_I'm here for you_  
_There's nothing you can say_  
_Nothing you can do_  
_There's no other way when it comes to the truth_  
_So, keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it through_

_Ahh, ahh_  
_Keep holding on_  
_Ahh, ahh_  
_Keep holding on_  
_There's nothing you can say_  
_Nothing you can do_  
_There's no other way when it comes to the truth_  
_So, keep holding on_  
_Cause you know we'll make it through_  
_We'll make it __through_

When the song ended I jumped out my window, landing on my paws and ran towards Bella`s house.

I had to talk to her, make her understand the danger she's in, luckily no one was phased and I made it there without trouble.

I stood in the woods behind her house when I remembered I shredded my clothes when i phased.

I plopped down and waited.

Not ten minutes later, Bella pulled up on the bike, got off it and went inside. I waited until I heard her in her room listening to music I didn't recognize.

What had I done? What did Sam say to her? This girl didn't look like Bella, with black and pink hair.

I phased back to human and looked for a rock, finding one the right size I picked it up and threw it.

It hit the glass of her window with a loud clank.

Bella looked out her window and saw me, she stared for a moment before disappearing, my heart sank and I turned to leave when I heard the back door open and Bella stepped outside.

She handed me sweatpants and a baggy shirt.

I quickly threw the clothes on and stared at my feet.

"What are you doing here Leah?"

My head snapped up at the tone of her voice.

"Bella, I had to see you i-"

"You had to see me? Seriously? I'm not in the mood for you bullshit Leah" she cut me off.

"Bella…what happened to you?"

She laughed dark and humorlessly.

"Me? You're asking me that? Says the person who abandoned me to be with her ex, you know what just don't come by here ever again"

She walked away, leaving me there brokenhearted.

I used my pain to phase and ran back, once I got home I jumped up the side of my house and landed in my room, quickly putting clothes on I pressed play on my CD player and let the darkness take over me.

* * *

**A/N - What do y'all think? REVIEW!**

**-NWP**.


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